what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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