It's like a parade of train wrecks.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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