I skipped work to stalk him.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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