I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
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You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
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I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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