If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm sobbing to NWA
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize