You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
