Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(831): View more from California

my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.

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(845): View more from New York

Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.

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(503): View more from Oregon

My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.

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(315): View more from New York

Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.

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(585): View more from New York

Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there

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(440): View more from Ohio

I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.

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(551): View more from New Jersey

Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?

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(858): View more from California

He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad

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