Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
two words...techno handjob
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
