I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
barbara walters just said penis...
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
