when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
