I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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