i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
