covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
he thought i was a dude.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize
