You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
