I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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