Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
