Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
