Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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