Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize