so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
