so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
