also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
of course. lets lasso hookers.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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