Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Ladies don't puke and tell
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize