I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
she woke up with a sticky ear
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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