every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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