This is not my ceiling
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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