So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
