Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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