How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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