i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
