my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
