Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
