the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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