Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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