i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
