He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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