mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize
