I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize
