she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
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You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize