wrigley field is MILF paradise
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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