I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
A+ Viking dick
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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