so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
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