pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
