Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
