Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
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