If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You are the jesus of drinking
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
