One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize