I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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