I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
