The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Randomize